(Originally posted on sixmilevillage.com 3/10/04)
I’ve been pondering for a very long time upon a statement I said in a fit of annoyance a while back. After hearing news of many people who were coupling up, I turned to my friend and said, “I guess it’s easier for stupid people to fall in love.” And now I’m here to say that statement is true.
Granted, not everyone who is stupid is in love, and not everyone who is or has been in love is stupid. If that were true, then the world would be full of stupid people… wait a second…
No, but in all seriousness, I believe that’s true. Stupid people have an easier time going with their instincts about someone. They’ll meet someone, hang out, have fun, and then--fwah-BANG!, they’re in love.
Smart people will analyze every aspect of their relationships, and this goes doubly for girls because we’re natural worriers. A smart person thinks: Well, he/she talks to me, smiles at me, and makes me laugh. But what if they just want to be friends? What if I just want to be friends? Because if we ever dated, then it would be weird if we ever broke up. We couldn’t be friends.
What if he/she is thinking that I like him/her? What if he/she thinks that I think that he/she thinks that I like him/her? What if he/she thinks that I think that he/she thinks that I think that he/she thinks that I think that he/she likes me? But odds are, if I take the square root of the hypoteneuse with the cosine and the tangent of the three-sided geometric divided by the circumference of his/her heart, that I’ll end up in a love triangle. Maybe I shouldn’t love him/her, and just save me the trouble.
Thus begins the love struggle of a smart person. Smart people have a hard time taking a chance because smart people sit and weigh the consequences. “I’m less likely to get hurt if I don’t risk it at all.” But without the risk, there is no joy. Without the heart ache comes no exuberance. Okay, there might be a little.
It’s almost as if stupid people have a silent agreement that when they meet another stupid person, they’ll fall in love. “Oh, you failed science, too? Let’s get married and have stupid children that will fail high school, cuz we’re too dumb to help them!” What is that? Leave each other alone! Get out of the gene pool! Don’t make me come in there!
Meanwhile, there are billions of smart people who never get married or have kids, simply because they make themselves too afraid to try. So we never get any smart kids. Slowly, the world is becoming dumber and dumber, and it’s all because smart people are too stupid to give love a chance.
So all you smart people, go on some dates, put on a swimming suit, and come on in, the water’s fine!!! People with an IQ under 100 must be accompanied by an adult.
No comments:
Post a Comment